Plants not only generate our oxygen,
they also capture traffic jams of C
O2; useless when we are killing trees
and burning fossil sunshine. Limestone rocks can
confirm that coral reefs will store more carbon
in their skeletons than a year’s supply of oil;
pointless when we keep finding ways to spoil
their pretty polyps. We have left this garden
to rot and now it’s time to make a stand,
take matters into our hands to save the world:
so give all virile boys fertile girls,
pack them full of vitamin E and grant
them privacy; focus all research by edict
on eliminating infant deaths; only succor
female babies; cancel medical support
for the aged - in fact, euthanize any relict
over 50; ban cremation; be efficient
and bury the dead quickly in welded casks
from recycled bicycles (methane has
the highest Global Warming Coefficient).
In other words, since we are 18%
carbon, we can set ourselves a goal
of trapping CO2 as human coal.
If no one breathes and all our waste is sent
down drilled disposal wells, we can create
a balanced pace of death to build a future
where people’s lives are truly carbon-neutral.
We call this Earth’s Sustainable Burial Rate.
by Lew Watts
Volume 12 Issue 2 >